Holding on
by Dr.RoseTennant
Summary: Somewhere deep down, Steve knew that they should move. Yet he couldn't bring himself to do so. In fact, the thought alone of letting go of the shivering woman in his arms seemed to hurt him in a way that nothing had ever done before.


**So I completely disagreed with the ending of Endgame and decided to write my own ending. **

Somewhere deep down, Steve knew that they should move. Yet he couldn't bring himself to do so. In fact, the thought alone of letting go of the shivering woman in his arms seemed to hurt him in a way that nothing had ever done before. It hurt more than the injections they gave him to administer the serum, more than seeing Bucky fall and being unable to save him. Even his last message to Peggy hadn't hurt him this much and neither had the realization of his own undeniable death when the ice cold water had trapped him inside his own body. The Arctic cold that had seeped into his body after crashing the plane had broken him. But now, the water sloshing around his legs and waist, while just as cold, did not even register in him. No, the burning heat that Natasha emitted claimed his every focus.

Her heartbeat was erratic, but oh so comforting. He kept reminding himself that as long as it was there, everything was going to be alright. She was straddling his legs but he kept her upper body pressed tightly against him. Afraid that if he let go even a little bit, he would lose her again. Not that Natasha was complaining. If fact, she was holding him as tightly as he was holding her.

From her point of view, it had not nearly been as long as it was for him. For her, opening her eyes while laying submerged in the cold water, had been just seconds after she had thrown herself of the cliff. She had been grasping for breath, expecting the excruciating pain of hitting the stones but only feeling the cold. It had taken him a minute to notice her after he woke up himself, but the second he noticed her it was as if his body was on auto-pilot. He had still been processing the fact that he was no longer on top of that horrid cliff when his body had been running the short distance to her. He was still processing the fact that she was actually there when his body had crushed her against his chest and he felt her heartbeat. He had been completely focused on her heartbeat when he had felt her wrap her arms around him, breathing heavily in his ear. Now here they were. Holding each other as if the other would be dusted away by the single thought of letting go.

"What happened?" He felt, rather than heard her ask. She was short on breath, her voice husky and her Russian accent showing. "We won Nat. We won". His voice was breaking. "It's over, we can go home" She lifted her heard from his shoulder, choosing instead to rest her forehead on his. Looking him straight in the eyes. He could see her eyes light up. "The others? Clint? And the dusted are they all back? Laura and the kids?". He looked down "We won and they came back, but it came at a price. We lost Tony." She closed her eyes, remembering and praying that he had found peace. He fully broke then. "I thought I had lost you as well" Tears were building up in his eyes. "I thought I would never see you again, that I would never be able to say goodbye" She opened her eyes, tears visible as well. "When I made the decision that it would be me that would jump" She said, her voice breaking, "I kept telling myself that we needed that stone to get everyone back and that I couldn't bring back Laura and the kids knowing that it was Clint that gave his life. I thought about you. How you had sacrificed yourself so that others could live their lives and realized that the way I felt right than must have been the same as it had been for you all those years ago. It gave me strength, you gave me strength. And when I finally let go, I could only think about you. I kept remembering your face when I told you that we would see each other in a minute. And it terrified me once I realized that I would never see you again".

The pain in both her eyes and voice was too much for him. He placed his hand gently on her face and placed his lips over her own. Her response was immediate. Kissing him back with passion. Their mouths coming together over and over again until they were once again out of breath. Breathless they held each other.

It was a while later when the cold water of Vormir finally registered. "We should go home" He said. "We should" They stood up but made no effort to let go of each other. "Do you still have your wristband for the machine?" He asked. Giving her the new set of codes for the correct timeline he activated it so that she would be able to go with him. He hesitated slightly in activating his own however. "Could we…" He started "Can I just hold you again. Once we are back they will all be excited and I just.." Understanding him, she quickly wrapped her arm around him. "I know" She whispered. Pulling back she gave him a smile "I know they will all want to see me. But they would be fools if they think I would let you out of my sight for just a second" Grabbing his hand she continued "I will be holding on to you. You are my strength". With a smile, he used his free hand to activate his own wristband. Looking into her eyes he told her "See you in a minute".

Arriving back onto the platform they were still staring into each other's eyes, holding hands. Hearing a strangled gasp they simultaneously turned around to come face to face with Bruce and Sam. Keeping a firm grip on his hand Natasha stepped of the platform to give them each a hug, she started explaining to them what happened form her point of view when Steve stopped her. "Maybe we should take this inside to where the others are". They agreed but quickly decided that Steve would stay outside with Natasha in order to surprise the others with her return.

Once Bruce and Sam had everyone in the living room of the house, Steve stepped inside first. He remained in the doorway, keeping his hand linked with Natasha's out of view. "Hey everyone, I asked everyone here to tell you two things. The first is that all the stones are back where they belong and there were no complications to the time line in bringing them back. It's finally over, we won." At that, everyone let out a relieved sigh. "You said two things" Clint remarked "So what is the catch." Keeping his face straight "Well, while there indeed where no complications in returning the stones, there might have been some surprises that popped up" He slowly adjusted his stance, allowing Natasha to step inside with him" "Hey guys".

It had taken Natasha well over an hour to tell her story and speak with everyone but she had kept her promise. She had held on to his hand the entire time. Now sitting on the couch, the exhaustion of the day was catching up to them. Leaning against his chest, Steve could feel Natasha drifting off. He was close to nodding off as well when Pepper approached him. "There is a spare room upstairs. I know that it has been a long pair of days for the both of you". Accepting the offer, he put his arms under Natasha's knees and shoulders carrying her upstairs. Quickly laying her down on the bed he took of her gear and leaving her in the legging and shirt she had been wearing underneath. Taking off his own gear he slipped in behind her. Curling around her he promised that he would never let her go again.


End file.
